No, just kidding. I just wanted to tell you some things I’ve learned from obsessively checking my blog stats this past year.
Things I Have Learned From Blog Stats
1. Firefox is a very popular web browser. So is Chrome. Explorer, not so much (but who’s surprised by that?). Safari’s lagging even behind IE.
2. There’s a browser called Iceweasel.
3. I have kind of a big following in Malaysia.
4. Number three may have something to do with the fact that for some reason I keep getting a lot of traffic from a teeth whitening webpage.
5. I hope number four is because I have nice white teeth. I really can’t tell what the hell that site’s spamming.
6. I’m *this close* to breaking 6,000 page views. This doesn’t include my own views of my blog. It does include the teeth whitening views of my blog.
7. There are a LOT of people getting misdirected to this blog by running Google searches about muscles. My muscle post has 395 total page views – more than three times the page views of my next-most popular post about the hippocampus, and more than ten times that of an average post.
8. Number seven happened because I stole a really useful image from someone else.
9. Outside of muscle terms, neuron terms, and my blog name, “love like woe zombie” is the only Google search term that made it into the all-time top ten search keywords used to access this blog. (Apparently someone used this term eight whole times to link here.)
10. In the past month, these search keywords led people to this blog a total of 35 times (gosh, I’m sorry!): “hippocampal relay”, “neuron”, “sex chromosomes”, “how to make sarcomere structure model”, “26’ uhaul truck total length” (P.S. I can totally answer that one for you – it’s 26 feet), “let them eat kait” (oh my God someone actually typed this into a search engine! Maybe!), “sarcomere model on paper”, “3x3 inch wall tiles photos”, “axon synapse”, and “bathroom tiles”. As far as I can tell only three of these 35 clicks were meant for me.
11. I have earned exactly zero dollars from my lack of advertisements. You’re welcome.
These all seem really self-denigrating, so I wanted to send a shout-out to the guy who sent me an e-mail saying he’d found my blog by searching for something like “zombie apocalypse survival” and stumbling onto this post. Man, you made my freaking year. Thank you for letting me believe that some of these accidental clicks are luring in people who actually read some of the rest of what I put here. I hope your novel-writing is going swimmingly!
Thank you all for reading this blog. I am in awe of all of you and am deeply humbled by your support.
P.S. – Guys, seriously, if you ever see me making a typo please let me know. I found like three today and it was depressing.